*A Letter of Thanks.....

This holiday season, I think my 4 year old son's teachers deserve to know how I appreciate them with WORDS. I know that bath lotions and coffee mugs are great, but how better can you show gratitude than something in writing?! (And cc'd to the Principal of course).

What it says:

Dear Mrs. Hughes and Mrs. Darby,                                                                  12-16-10






I want the two of you to know you are so appreciated by me. While I will not be able to convey just how much, I will state some reasons why:


You are selfless and I think, probably very often overlooked in the school. Children (not much older than toddlers), are brought to you and you are responsible for and entrusted to enrich them. YOU ARE SPECIAL!!Most can not open their milk or juice alone, tie their shoes or hold their bladders, many can not blow their nose or wipe themselves properly or even tell you exactly what they need or how they feel.....you are MIND READERS!! You somehow.....magically, make them loved and important enough in school that they don't kick and scream every morning upon arrival. You keep them engrossed, even though they have attention spans of a gnat. You are AMAZING!! You let us parents feel secure and hopeful when we leave our love, pride and fears with you. YOU ARE SUPERHEROES!!


I know that you are not thanked nearly enough. And I know that you do not take care of our children to be thanked. It is just YOU! It takes a very specific type of person to be able to do the things you do. You take these undisciplined, school-foreign, runny nosed, pants wetting, whiny, germy, stubborn, loving, kids......YOU MUST BE INSANE!


You open 20-ish milks/juices, zip 20-ish jackets and count heads more times in a day than you probably slept in hours last night. Yet, you find the time to make each one feel special. And I thank you! My child loves you and smiles SO BIG when he talks about you! THAT means the world to me.






Best Wishes,




Jennifer Paradise


cc: Linda Marr

If your child/children have a special teacher or teachers, that go above and beyond their "job-descriptions" and really love what they do (even though we have no idea how they could)......please tell them. Then tell the principal too =)

Thank you for being AMAZING, Mrs. Hughes and Mrs. Darby!!

*Doing it Right?!

I will not pretend to be perfect or even an expert on the subject, but I am a parent of a teenage daughter that is asked constantly, how the kids I am raising are so well behaved and "normal". I will focus mostly on Ariel, because I have been her parent longest. She fills me with huge amounts of pride, and in the same sentence, can make me feel like I am literally going insane. I have tried many different methods of discipline with her over the years and I was always left feeling that she was impossible.......now that I am older, as is she, I think it was ME that was impossible. Let me explain. We have preconceived notions of what this child is "supposed" to be. And when this child colors outside of those preconceived lines, we balk. I am not saying that we (the parents) are always wrong in this.....but I am saying that we are NOT always right!

Ariel is 15 1/2, driving, hormonal, intelligent, sassy, emotional, insecure, hopelessly forgiving, unreliable around the house, completely devoted to her sports and activities, a mean big sister, very sharp tongued, relentless when she wants something, crazy funny, and manipulative. All VERY NORMAL things for a young lady on her way to  being her own woman.

Now, my discipline/parenting is completely dependant on the child's attitude and maturity. As I mentioned, Ariel is starting to drive. Well, driving is not a right.....it is a privilege....and you better bet that if my teenager is acting like a 4 year old that has been told they can't have ice cream, then SHE WILL NOT DRIVE. If she is unable to find a way to help around the house and show some responsibility (without being asked).....then she will be UNABLE TO FIND HER PHONE. If she makes the horrendous decision to lie to me, then she will not have the pleasure of going to friends' houses or parties......I can not trust that good decisions will be made away from me if she has made crappy ones in front of me.

So there you have it.....very very simple and very hard for the child/teenager to argue. You are simply treating them at the age/maturity level they are behaving in. If your 12 year old wants to whine and pout like a 2 year old, then very bluntly......THEY ARE NOT MATURE ENOUGH FOR A PHONE! Would you buy a 2 year old a phone??? Didn't think so. If your child can not find a way to clean up after themselves, then THEY DO NOT NEED MORE THINGS!!! Why keep giving them more to take care of??? You are not FORCING this child to be anything that they are not ready for, if they want to be immature, then so be it. But you also should not reward their decision by treating them like they are mature and deserving of "older", more mature things.

We, as parents, need to take responsibility for our actions in enabling our children's bad behavior! You can not blame the child/teenager for what they have been ALLOWED to be. Have higher expectations of them, do not waver, and be rewarded!! They are not our puppets......but we can help them to be the BEST they will be when they are grown. Because we all know that selfishness, greed, hatefulness, temper tantrums and laziness don't just disappear in adulthood......who wants their child to be THAT PERSON when they are on their own??!! I sure don't.




If you have any nuggets of information that may be helpful to others on this topic, please feel free to share it below!

*My Secret Recipe (that I will share with only you)...



I have this recipe for Apple Bread and Muffins. I get loads of requests for me to make it for people. Sometimes a few loaves at a time. Each year, the orders are piling up more and more and to be honest, I just can't keep up. Sooooo, I have decided that I will share my recipe so that those that are able to bake for themselves can. I will continue to indulge those whom I know burn water. =)

2-ish Apples (I use Gala, Honeycrisp or Fugi)
1 cup Sugar
1/2 cup Oil
2 Eggs
1tsp. Vanilla
1/2 tsp. Almond Extract (optional...but I love it)
1 1/2 cups Flour
1tsp. Cinnamon
1/2 tsp Baking Soda
1/4 tsp. Salt


-Peel and finely chop apples to equal 1 1/2 cups. Set aside.

-Stir together sugar, oil, eggs, vanilla and almond extract in a large bowl.

-In a separate bowl, stir together flour, cinnamon, baking soda and salt then add this mixture to the sugar mixture. Stirring just until blended. (Batter will be stiff).

-Fold in apples.

For Bread:
-Pour in to greased 9x5 loaf pan and Bake at 350 degrees for 1 hour.

For Muffins:
-Poor in to greased or lined muffin cups and Bake at 400 degrees for 18 minutes. (They do not rise much, so you can fill the cup up)

I hope you enjoy as much as we all do! Let me know if you try this and what, if any, modifications you made to the recipe. I would love to hear it.

*15 (other) reasons to get married....

From: Brides January 2011 | Bridesmag.com

 1. You can (finally) change your Facebook status.

 2. You have someone to watch bad reality TV- and trade snarky comments- with.

 3. Um, hello- gift registry!

 4. Someone else can walk the dog at 11p.m. on a cold, rainy night.

 5. At weddings, you can stay seated during the bouquet toss.

 6. "I need to check with my husband" stops cold callers in their tracks.

 7. Two words: health insurance

 8. You have a "plus one" for infinity.

 9. Your cat died.

10. You can stop "celebrating" being single and admit that you kinda like fighting over the remote, tripping over his tennis shoes, and being accountable to someone.

11. Your Netflix queue needs a shot of testosterone.

12. Aunt Helen has officially stopped asking, "When?" at every single family get-together.

13. And now, when Aunt Helen asks, "When?" -about something else- you can point and say, "Ask him."

14.Unless you're a Civil War reenactor, life simply doesn't present that many opportunities for a floor-length dress.

15. Someone always has your back.

-Barrie Gillies


Reason 16: He can go through life not asking for directions- because you'll do it for him.

*Listen to My life

My most recent fixation (aside from the baking)......I have started a new blog, in addition to this one, that is music based. I feel like as we get older we "forget" so much. Memories, good and bad, get buried under more memories and events and feelings and we lose touch with them. But when you smell that certain smell or hear that "one specific song" you are hit hard with the memory and emotion....like no time at all has passed. I am trying to make a diary of sorts for myself, of all of these memories since childhood. Without even having to write a word, I can relive and remember all of these specific feelings and memories.....happy or sad. I have this overwhelming fear of forgetting everything and losing myself........so I am making sure that I have these Feelings That I Felt Right Then on record.....so I won't ever forget........


If you read this blog.....then chances are I have memories with you......so no doubt, you will recognize some of these emotions......and remember too....

http://mymemoriesandsuch.blogspot.com/

*Stress No More.....

You can get a quick fix for most anything these days.....it may not be the healthiest thing to do, but it will be quick. Hungry no more......Hot Flashes no more......Fat no more......you get the idea.  I have never been one to buy in to these things.....but if there were a 'Stress No More' - quick fix, I would have to really really refrain from jumping on the bandwagon and being one of the first 100 callers to order (and maybe even scoring a freebie too).

I know EVERYONE has stress.....even my children have their own forms of stress.....but for me.....right this second......my stress level is a tad out of control. Lawsuit filed......Holidays.....Illnesses in the family....my own permanent disabilities.....a grandma that needs extra care and I am 1700 Miles Away.....my Social Security Disability case up for review....... a 15 Year Old Daughter Starting to Drive...... Planning a wedding that is a little over 6 months and 1200 miles away......Training two dogs.....a Horrendous anxiety disorder...... Blah, Blah, Blah........

Anyways......my point to this is not to dwell on the stress, but to find ways to put my big girl panties on and deal with it.....without a quick fix. Lately (well, since the gas leak was fixed), I have been cooking and baking like crazy.....it is super comforting and a big distraction from the stress. The only problem is that I don't necessarily want to eat all of it.....so I give it away to people.....whether they want it or not. I am FORCING my baked goods upon people.....ha ha. I go through different phases, then circle back around....sometimes it is sewing, then I move on to logic problems, and lord......I think everyone stops talking to me and goes in to hiding when I am on my knitting kick.....I am afraid no one wants any more scarves or purses.....so I started donating all of them.

So here is my question to you.......

How do you handle, distract yourself from, and get through super stressful times? I could use some new ideas and my family .......they will be so so grateful for me to move on to something new to obsess over!

*Acceptance is the First Step....

As I am learning to accept the fact that my children are growing up.....I am learning that I have to have grown up talks with them.

Corey is the youngest....now 4 and in school full time, he has developed new behaviors. He becomes pissy emotional when told he is too young to do things. He is upset in the photo above because he wants a driver's license and does not have one. So Joey made one for him that says, "I Can Drive".

Talking to him and explaining that he will grow up too, is bittersweet. Seeing the elation on his face when told he'll be a man like daddy one day, makes my heart flutter.

Joey, playing air-guitar above, is 7. He is the middle child and a lot of the times.....bless his heart, on the back burner. He is SUCH a good child that he just doesn't demand a ton of attention.

He is at an age where he is easily frustrated by his little brother, and usually disgusted with his older sister.



He marches to his own beat, hates that he can not have a Mohawk all year long, and is now reading chapter books (that he is so so proud of). I am trying to teach Joey that girls in fact, do not have cooties!

 

Ariel, the big 1-5, is my source of indigestion gray hairs  energy. She is 100% becoming her own person.....woman. She is way too busy for my liking, and she juggles so much that I see me in her. She is in all honors classes, makes honor roll, runs cross country, cheers, is Vice President of FCA, in Public Relations for FFA and runs track. She makes it ALL a priority, does not let anyone down, and gives a thousand percent........UNTIL she gets home. (Big smiley face)....you hush, Mom! She has a hard time rinsing a dish or putting away her own clothes. Typical in every way, I suppose.



I am trying to let her learn on her own, what true friendships/relationships are and mean. It is extremely difficult, as a parent, to see your child learn first hand that a relationship is not what they though it was. My instinct is to save her...before damage is done....but that would not teach her anything.

She is learning to drive now. A HUGE deal for a parent. I am so proud that she is becoming such a responsible, smart, efficient, young woman, but it does make me yearn for those days when she was learning to tie her shoes.

And PS......I am teaching Ariel that boys DO have cooties!